Kyle & Maura

Who we are as a family:

Maura describing Kyle

Kyle is one of those jack-of-all-trades kind of people with a music degree, a job in technology, a love of sports, and also is the chef of our home. Kyle is an avid learner, especially when it comes to deepening his faith. One thing I really admire about Kyle is his wisdom. He thinks deeply with sound judgment in a way I’ve never seen before. For anyone who knows him, this has made him such a gift and a blessing as a trustworthy source to transparently process just about any topic or challenge of life with.

A second thing I admire about Kyle is the responsibility and ownership he takes in our home. He cooks, grocery shops, takes care of repairs and also helps with cleaning and other administrative tasks. I know this type of sacrificial love and prioritization of the family/home isn’t a given and I can’t wait for a child to join our family and experience this same kind of masculine love, care and attentiveness.

Kyle is wise and responsible, and yet also a kid at heart. He finds excitement in many things in life and often cannot contain his excitement, bursting out into goofiness, energy, and laughter. Or one of my personal favorites—bursting out in some impromptu song about whatever he’s excited about.

Kyle describing Maura

The first thing I always say to describe Maura is that she’s very steady. She never gets too high or gets too low and has a calmness about her that I’ve always found attractive. Other people notice this too and it makes her an enjoyable and easy person to be around. It’s pretty hard to dislike her! Much of her calmness comes from her love of God and trust in his goodness.

In contrast to her calm demeanor, Maura can be very playful and silly, especially when it’s just the two of us! Laughing together has been a real strength in our marriage and we plan on making laughter a defining trait of our household when we have children.

There are so many more things that can be said about Maura. She’s hardworking. She invests in other people. She loves a good restaurant. And she loves being outdoors, either in the garden (she loves a good homegrown carrot) or going for walks. She is strong and resilient when challenges come her way and reflecting on this makes me so thankful I got to marry her. I am confident she will make an incredible mother someday!

Our views on openness in adoption:

In adoption we highly value and desire openness. We believe this is in the best interest for all, especially for the child to develop a confident sense of self and healthy security throughout their life.

Though there can be complexities in openness, we are strongly committed to it and desire an ongoing relationship with the birth family. As with all relationships, we believe open and respectful communication is the foundation to building a trusting relationship. We anticipate that relationships with the birth family may ebb and flow depending upon seasons of life, but are committed to, at minimum, face-to-face visits at least every three months and monthly texting or emails. We believe there is beauty in adoptive parents and birth parents growing to trust and care for one another, and that this loving relationship will indirectly cause the child to feel loved by both sets of parents.

We believe our home should be a bedrock of safety for our child to ask questions around their adoption. We plan to celebrate their adoption story early and often and plan to regularly initiate small conversations like “I wonder if you got that ability from your birth mom.”

Knowing adoption will be something a child processes in different ways and at different phases throughout their lives, we are committed to being a home of truth and love around adoption as a key piece to their healthy identity formation.